Archive for the 'Florida' Category

I’ll buy it and leave it just like this. I’ve always found drywall and finished floors to be a little pretentious, n’est-ce pas?
Found by: Memphis Belle

Here’s a question for you. Is the moist stain on its way in to the house — or on its way out?

Found by: Jerusha

Loveliest comment, by bryn: Eeeee, proof of spontaneous human combustion! Obviously someone moved the single remaining shoe (there always seems to be a totally unsinged shoe left behind) before taking the photo, but still

When I moved into my house, the previous owners helpfully left behind a folder with local take-out menus and the like. Seeing as they’d had two large dogs, I think a photo like this could’ve been useful, too — that way it might not have taken me over a week to track down all the deposits the dogs had left behind. Look! Right there! That’s one of his favorite spots.

Found by: Jesseh

Loveliest comment, by Stuart: Weichert Realtors, where finding you the perfect house is always Number Two. I mean One.

Included: washer, dryer, microwave, children of all creeds and races living in peace and harmony.
Found by: Alicia

Oh no! The weight of the butterflies caused the house sink into the ground until only the roof remained visible. How tragic.

Found by: Aliza

Loveliest comment, by jim-bob: This house is located in Gulf Breeze, Florida. Now, for those of you who have never heard of it, it was the location of a rash of UFO sightings a few years ago. An A frame is sort of like a pyramid, so this house was obviously built and furnished by aliens looking to use it’s pyramidal shape and butterfly wallpaper to induce a mind control vortex and take over the local population. Sadly, the aliens did not have the greatest of credit due to their lack of employment history on this planet, and ended up getting a sub-prime loan with an adjustable rate. it wound up getting foreclosed on by a force greater than their technology- the collapse of the US economy. Thus we see it offered here, waiting to be used by a new owner in their quest for world domination.

Happy Chairtuday, all!

Chair‘s been missing for a while. It turns out Chair was at a family reunion down in Florida:

Oh, come now. Are we supposed to believe that when a group of Chairs get together, they just stand around nicely and chit-chat? I think not.

Here’s an alternate view of the same scene — this one, oddly enough, wasn’t chosen for the condominium’s website, but was tracked down by an intrepid Chair spotter:

That’s more like it. Looks like Chair’s family reunions are pretty much what I’d expect.

Found by: Mark (alternate view here or here. Warning: .pdf files.)

Loveliest comment, by kristen55: There’s always one guy at the reunion who can’t hold his liquor.

Clearly the seller of this house is Erin Andrews.

Oh God, this is awful. I make an Erin Andrews reference and I link to the New York Post. What’s wrong with me? What? Why didn’t I go with the Kramer joke? Oh, I am filled with shame…

Found By: Dave M

Loveliest comment, by Denita TwoDragons: Those aren’t fisheye pics! The house was built for Weebles!

“It could be developed with multi-family, office, retail, etc.” says the listing, and once again I wonder and the narrow view of the real estate agent. “Etc’? How can you type “etc” when you could type AWESOME CASTLE. And then in “exterior features” the only quality mentioned is “in city limits” when it clearly should say IT HAS MERLONS! Come on, how often does a real estate agent get to say “merlons” in a listing? I’ve been writing about real estate for over one thousand posts and this is my first chance.

MERLONS!!

Found By: Allison L

Loveliest comment, by Land of shimp: A moat scaled to this particular castle would probably be best served by sea monkeys. Wouldn’t want to dwarf the joint.

Ooh, what I would give to have five minutes alone in this house with my son’s pogo stick…

(Found By: Jennifer R. From the “Oh the Chihulity” series.)

Loveliest comment: Heather’s You’d think a listing for a $29 million house could afford some paragraph breaks …

But… but… look at it! The house is only two inches high! Who the H-E-double-hockeysticks is supposed to live here, the Borrowers?

(Found By: Sharon G)