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"Sold by private treaty, price withheld." With features like "an abundance of heat sources," lack of an actual stove (cooking camptops and toaster-oven sized ovens don't count), an undercounter fridge that doesn't even open onto the kitchen, and a tomb-like garage, I'm sure it cost a fortune.
Oh, dear … poor, Chair, looks so lonely and forlorn.
Let's rescue Chair, shall we?
I think Chair is hiding from the burn barrel on the other side of the garage…
Shhhh! Chair is working undercover and you are totally blowing his cover!
Looks like Chair has had too many White Russians.
He's got a gangsta' lean and appears to be in surveillance mode for the KGB.
Wow, checkout the cooktop and the oven beside it in the kitchen.
It's like that weird stove from Bewitched has a baby.
Hey, is that the Amish Fireplace?